Everything I have poured into this relationship, just wasn’t enough..
That is what hurts me more than anything. I have shattered myself trying to be the kind of person that you would hold in higher regards to others.
“I have given you my absolute love and support…I have given you my all.”
Somehow, I thought that giving myself so completely would keep your mind focused on what was detrimental to the growth of our bond. Was I so wrong?
My heart feels cold tonight. I am torn between wanting to absolve you from the typical human issues which now afflict our love- and also needing to stand firm on what I have always believed regarding the issue of love.
”What we give each other should be enough. And if it is not? Then, no matter how painful this revelation may be…we are just not suited for one another.”
To set the record straight…
I know that I was once your beautiful, carefree girl who was so easily able to divert your attentions away from the ills of everyday living. But, when I no longer wished to be adorned for such triviality, is when all soured between us. I ask, is it really so unreasonable that I should want every action to have a deeper recourse than just surface restorations?
Having now existed on the other side of this matter for some time,…
It is so painful being unable to keep the attention of my loved one…
All because I am not speaking in a manner which you prefer…
How did this happen, my love?
You are in essence saying to me, that a beautiful stranger is better equipped to garner your complete consideration, because they will not inconvenience you with struggle. Has everything really fallen this far away from how things used to be between us?
“For all that I have given in the name of loving you…I deserve better than to exist as the constant bring down. Don’t you agree?”
Thank you for your words.
It was nice to receive something so introspective after so many years of silence.
This was the deciding factor in why I even spoke to you at all this afternoon. I wish I could say that this pain I am feeling was now also behind me…but, I cannot.
I am still very unsettled on the issue of our next move.
“My whole existence has become about not feeling ashamed of who I am…and I just cannot change all the wrong fast enough to save us”
Please understand how difficult it is being me in this moment…